It makes me suffer – a dear friend told me once – to see you go here and there to beg and glean some funds for the table of the poor. I hope to become rich enough that I can help you much more.” My answer came immediately: “I am not a poor beggar. I am a rich person. I am rich of the joy that comes from feeling welcome by God’s merciful and infinite love. This gives me a free and happy heart.”
I remember once when, after taking part in a wedding banquet, I realized that so many delicious courses and dainties were left untouched. Seeing all that plenty, I approached the person responsible for the buffet and asked him if I could be allowed to take some of those tasty foods for the boys I had left at home (we are managing three Family-Houses with 25 boys). The person responsible very happily agreed and gave me two large bags; he invited me to take all that I needed. I couldn’t believe my ears. I filled the two bags with choice meat, exquisite cakes, chicken, fish, rice and several other delicacies which my boys go crazy about.
A devout churchgoer, who was present when I was happily being a predator, approached me with an attitude of annoyance and told me: “But, Father, have a little dignity! At least for the sake of the habit you are wearing. Are you not ashamed to do that?” My answer was prompt and decisive: “I know very well how much my boys appreciate these good things and I would feel guilty if I had to go back to them empty handed… That would have been the greatest shame!”
BOWING TO THE POOR
Many people think that my missionary life must be beautiful and happy because it is filled with so many important activities to be done. These people think that it is those actions that bring me satisfaction and joy. It is not like that at all. On the contrary, the works I do in my priestly life, besides being a beggar for the love of God, can be summed up to only 3 or 4, not more, simple gestures that make my life happy and full of so much serenity.
The first and most significant reality of my apostolate is that of “being together” with my volunteers: to work with them, to sweat with them when it is hot, to experience together the swelling of legs when our service becomes heavy; not being afraid of dirtying my hands with the sauces and of the smells of the kitchen in order to serve the poor. Towards the end of the evening, after having worked the whole afternoon side by side with them, I approach each volunteer, put my hand on his/her shoulder and whisper: “Thank you, brother!” or “Thank you, sister!” It is because of the commitment and sacrifice of these men and women that we can open our soup kitchen everyday and accept 450 people, who come to our threshold, and offer them something good to eat.
Another beautiful aspect of my daily life is that of welcoming the poor who come to our gate with a profound and devout bow – here in the Far East, culturally, the greeting is a bow more than a handshake; bowing is a sign of respect and sincere humility. While I bow, bending my body as low as I can, and with a cordial smile, I tell them: “Welcome this evening. I hope you will like our supper. Please make yourselves at home.”
A WITNESS OF GOD’S SIGNS
Another beautiful dimension of my missionary commitment is fulfilled rather late in the evenings. After having closed the soup kitchen and put everything in order, I go to visit our three Family-Houses and stay a bit with the boys. I listen to them and exchange some words with them. Then, on taking my leave, I extend a light caress to their faces, one by one, and wish them good night. I go back to the community late at night, tying up the loose ends before going to bed. After having placed my existence in the Lord’s merciful heart, I spend some time recalling the great favors the Lord has done for me during the day and for each one I whisper with all my heart: “I praise you, Lord … for the friend that you made me encounter today; I praise you, Lord… for that little offering that has reached me today; I praise you, Lord… because the boys are fine; I praise you, Lord… for those unexpected bags of rice; I praise you, Lord….” This is the most beautiful moment of my being a missionary: in the darkness of the night, in the solitude of my little room, I give witness to the Lord for the marvelous realities that He accomplishes everyday in my life.
My missionary existence is not a frantic going, traveling, converting, doing… no, no. It is just being a witness of God’s love, of God’s miracles and signs He gives me every moment. It is I who have to be converted first so that I may then give witness to others, not so much with words but with my life – that God is a loving Father and takes care of us, His most beloved children.
FULL OF JOY AND HAPPINESS
Concluding this reflection on my missionary commitment, I can tell you, honestly, that those few gestures I wrote about: to beg out of love; to bow in front of the poor saying: “You are welcome!”; to whisper: “thank you” to the generous volunteers of the Center, with my hand on their shoulders; to extend a caress to the boys before sending them to bed, wishing them good night; to give a true and sincere praise that becomes a prayer to the Lord before falling asleep: all these make my life full of joy and happiness. This has been my missionary life for twenty years. Others may think that my life is boring and meaningless. I don’t mind. It is sufficient for me, and it gives fullness of life to my heart.
Tomorrow, sure of God’s love, I will start again doing the 3 or 4 small things that make my life great and my spirit happy. My only desire is to witness to the whole world the marvels of the Risen Jesus who is alive in our midst.
